Harold P. Kirby, LCSW/BCD

Relationship Obsession (R-OCD)

Relationships are an important and essential part of our human experience. Forming and sustaining intimate relationships is valuable in our society and can cause major stress for OCD sufferers and non-sufferers alike. When OCD is present and demanding certainty within your relationship, it creates additional stressors that can increase relationship discord and decrease your relationship …

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Mindfulness: CBT, MBCT, and Trying to Think a Feeling Away

You can learn to relate more skillfully to your emotions using mindfulness. A common mistake that we make, however, is depending on our rational, problem-solving mind to fix negative emotions. Remember that emotions are a complex fusion of feelings, thoughts, urges, and bodily sensations. You can only experience emotions, you cannot fix them. Trying to …

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From CBT to Mindfulness or MBCT

There are many therapeutic approaches that help decrease human distress and suffering. In this article, I will talk about two approaches, including a mindfulness practice, that have been influential and successful in understanding and treating many mental health and quality-of-life issues. Both are based in a present-moment orientation and represent a welcome joining of Eastern …

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Where Was I Just Then? Mindfulness

Mindfulness:  Identifying our thoughts, images and automatic reactivity to them. Seeing our thoughts instead of being our thoughts. Paying attention For many years as I ate a meal I noticed that often the last bite of whatever I was eating tasted so good.  Better than all the other bites, in fact.  I have to admit that …

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What is mindfulness meditation?

What is meditation? The Pali word for meditation is “Bhavana,” which means “to make grow” or “to develop.” What is mindfulness? Mindfulness meditation is what comes from paying attention to something in this moment, on purpose, and without judgment. Adapted from Jon Kabat-Zinn’s Audio “Mindfulness for Beginners“. Personal Insights on Mindfulness Meditation I’m sitting here preparing …

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What Mindful Meditation Practice is Not

There are many myths and misunderstandings regarding what a mindful meditation practice is. So let’s start from the end.  I’ll explain what I mean by starting from the end.  I have a friend who, while in music school years ago, used to practice all the wrong notes in a musical scale on his saxophone. This …

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